See, what you need to understand is that “Not all guys like that” is never going to work. Because you’re answering an entirely different conversation than what women are actually saying.
You think women are saying “Every man is a predator and a danger to me.” And you’re replying, “But I’m not like that.”
But women aren’t saying that. They’re saying “There are too many situations where women have to worry about their safety,” and you’re saying “That’s not important.” They’re saying “Women are constantly told it’s their fault if something bad happens,” and you’re saying “Don’t worry about it.” They’re saying “Too often, women find their trust violated by men,” and you’re saying “But you should trust me!”
They’re saying “So many men have decided that what they want is more important than anything about a woman.” And you’re replying “I’m exactly like that.”
I argued about this with too many stupid people in my life, because they believed I took care of myself for someone other than myself. They were all like “oooh, who is that lipstick for?”. I had the most ridiculous conversations that ended with their disgusting snickers, almost like they were saying “Yeah, right. Explain all you want. I’ll believe what I want.”
I wish I had more like-minded people in my life.
The last gif is extra important: WE DON’T DO THIS SHIT FOR YOU.
When I was a teenager, I was very critical of feminism too. I was a white girl, about to grow up into a world of white privilege, and I didn’t see the point. Then, the workplace discrimination started happening, then the sexual harassment, then the assaults, then the catcalls, then the condescension from men who weren’t as smart or accomplished as me, the sports coach who was too friendly, the male mentor with other intentions, the drunk male friend who won’t leave the room after the party so you can sleep, the car horns blaring, the groping: it all started happening at about the age of fifteen. I started realising that there was a large portion of the population to whom I was as good as chattel: I was an object to be acted upon.
I also started realising that I’ve been a female misogynist my whole life, and had a lot of unlearning to do too. Change starts with eliminating the noxious parts of yourself you have internalised during socialisation in a misogynistic culture. Feminism isn’t just about stopping the abuse of women by men, it’s about stopping the abuse we do to ourselves and others by genuinely beginning to believe we deserve to be treated as less than human.
LET ME JUST-
Feminism isn’t just about stopping the abuse of women by men, it’s about stopping the abuse we do to ourselves and others by genuinely beginning to believe we deserve to be treated as less than human.
Step 1: Comment on a woman’s attractiveness on every single occasion in every single venue no matter how irrelevant it is. Build up a dating culture entirely dependent on a female’s beauty. Teach children that only attractive women will ever get anywhere in life, will ever be praised, will ever find love and have a family, will ever have a chance at happiness, are worth knowing, are worth being.
Step 2: Mock women for caring about how they look. Call them shallow.
The notorious character type who bobbed her hair, smoke cigarettes, drank gin, sported short skirts, and passed her evenings in steamy jazz clubs, where she danced in a shockingly immodest fashion with a revolving cast of male suitors.”
“The New Woman of the 1920s boldly asserted her right to dance, drink, smoke, and date— to work her own property, to live free of the strictures that governed her mother’s generation. (…) She flouted Victorian-era conventions and scandalized her parents. In many ways, she controlled her own destiny”